Fiction

’Uncanny Valley: Collected Short Stories’ is now available as a print-on-demand book or as a PDF download. It contains most of my published work from the past ten years or so, including several stories from ’The Nothings’ internet fiction project (now offline). Complete contents:

Published stories: ’Teen Lite’, ’Ecosystem Discovered in Saatchi’s Pocket’, ’Googlehead’, ’The Parable of Peta and the Impossible Saint’, ’Lives of the Predators’, ’Walking in the Last Days’, ’Multi Medea’, ’Lisa Drives Home’ and ’Two Steps’.

From this site: ’Socksucker & Prostitot’, ’Schadenfreude’ and ’Thanks for Sharing’.

Plus two new stories: ’Mickey’s Mouth’ and ’The Anachronist’.

184 pages, large format paperback, £7.99/€10/$15 + postage. ISBN 978-1-4092-1113-6.

PDF download £1.50/€1.85/$3.

BUY IT HERE.

Also available worldwide via online stores (e.g. Amazon) and from real life, actual book shops to order.

SCHADENFREUDE (2006)

The journalists at Gene (The Magazine for Modern Parents) have some article-worthy psychosexual problems of their own.

Complete text, previously unpublished.

ECOSYSTEM DISCOVERED IN SAATCHI’S POCKET (2002/2006)

A tale of Young British Artists who forget that some things are not art. First published online at 3am Magazine. Paper version published by Snow Books, summer 2006.

(Offsite links)

THANKS FOR SHARING (2005)

An identity thief discovers that living somebody else’s life IS brain surgery...

Complete text, previously unpublished.

MULTI MEDEA (2004)

A housekeeper makes some changes at her employer’s home in PULP.NET’s September 2004 edition.

(Offsite link) 

GOOGLEHEAD (2003)

The last intellectual in London escapes from the zoo in this story for PULP.NET’s July 2003 issue.

(Offsite link)

100 BLACK BOXES (2001)

100 words each by 100 different characters at the moment of their death.

(Offsite link)

SOCKSUCKER & PROSTITOT (2001)

Teenagers falling in like with each other and getting arrested.

Complete text.

WALKING IN THE LAST DAYS (2000)

Complete text of a story from the rare, limited edition ’Flesh’ anthology produced for Metapod Expo 2000, also featuring work by Sadie Plant and Susanna Glaser.

Complete text.

LISA DRIVES HOME (1997)

From the anthology of stories about twenty four hour party people Allnighter, edited by Michael River, with stories by Tim Etchells and Iain Sinclair.

Complete (revised) text.

TEEN LITE (1996)

Post nuclear fiction from the Fission anthology edited by Elaine Palmer. Other authors in this collection include Nicholas Royle and James Flint.

Complete (revised) text.

Novels

THEIR HEADS ARE ANONYMOUS (1997)

Parry is the only person who sees the saucers hovering over Bigger Amusement World. Since he’s dressed as a giant rabbit and suffering a bit from the heat in his funfur suit, nobody believes him. Bigger Amusement World is a wholesome land of family fun. Charles Bigger is a snuff pornographer who wants to control it. His father sold it out. His father was weak. His father didn’t have a private army at his disposal.

But the flying saucer pilots have got their own plans for the amusement world...

ISBN 1901072029 - Currently out of print but a few copies may be available second hand.

A PDF version is available. You can read an extract and then download the whole book free on the next page. This novel’s been plagiarised several times on the sly and on one occasion absolutely blatantly and actionably. Now you (sort of, within reason) have my permission as I’m releasing it under a Creative Commons license.

"Smart, accomplished and sharply focused satire... Imagine a George Romero zombie flick remixed by Luis Buñuel on a bad day at Euro Disney."

i-D

"Disney won’t be too happy about the resolutely subversive approach... a bizarre read, but an engaging one."

SFX

MONKEY BOYS (1999)

In a rural research lab in a forgotten corner of England, monkeys are being genetically engineered to produce Millennium Therapeutics International’s latest drug. Calvin the bodybuilding ex-McKing Burger flipper, Nick the Dumped Alcoholic and acid casualty Stereo Mike are all guinea-pigging, testing drugs for cash. Outside, Calvin’s sister Leah is part of a protest camp that spends its nights ripping up and burning MTI’s genetically modified crops. Now they all just have to work out whether they’re safer outside or inside.

ISBN 1901072207 - Currently out of print but a few copies may be available second hand.

A PDF version of this book will be available sometime in 2009.